1)I give them icecream for breakfast.
2)When they ask me for something my answer is always, “Whatever, I dont care just be careful and don’t make mommy have to take you to the hospital or jail!”
3)I tell my husband to shut up I can’t hear the TV when he is yelling at them.
4) I sneak them treats after dark
5)I write notes to the teacher to excuse their homework not being done!
6) We have a sign in our kitchen that reads “Remember, as far as anyone knows we are a nice, normal family”.
7) I play catch from the kitchen window with my son (no we don’t have a screen-stop judging me).
8)I let them drive when I’m Drunk (they LOVE that).
9) My boy has broken 6 bikes in two years… and I keep getting him new ones! – okay well the neighbours kids keep loosing them….(it is new to him so he doesn’t mind!!)
10) I surround them with the Gays and sinners… I’m TOTALLY saving their souls yo!!